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This is very clearly visible in a relationship between a drug addict and their “enabler.” The codependent enabler tries to get the addict to stop taking their drug of choice, while the addict, the one with the power to stop, is happy to abdicate their responsibility and rely on the codependent enabler.
The result is disability: the resources and patience of the addict’s partner get increasingly depleted, while the addict slowly dies. Just as it takes two people to have a healthy relationship, it also takes two people to have a dysfunctional relationship. The ultimate knowledge of reality lies with the narcissist. Her: I can hear that you’re angry by the sound of your voice!
Narcissism and codependence are both diseases of responsibility. After enough of these relationships, it becomes possible to know what is happening inside the narcissist, or in their world, simply by listening to their accusations.
When ability to respond is decoupled from responsibility, people start to get disabled. Gaslighting is a technique used by the narcissist in dysfunctional relationships to convince the other person that their views are wrong.